Fruit Inspection

So I’ve mentioned before that we live on a few nicely wooded acres. But the area that surrounds the house is sodded with several plant beds throughout the front and back yards. I would even venture to say that there are more landscaped areas than there are grassy spots because my husband is not a fan of mowing. His solution? Pine beds with lots of small bushes, crepe mrytles, and flowering plants.

His solution worked for me. Or at least it did when we moved in 3 years ago.

Three years ago we had our own personal “yard guy”. He maintained the “grounds”. We could afford to run the sprinkler system and pay Chemlawn to spray for weeds and fertilize for us. The yard looked GREAT!

In July of 2006 we were in the beginning stages of this recession and so the “yard guy”, Chemlawn, and green grass were some of the first things to go. We still had employees we could send over to mow, weed, and lay pine straw. So it didn’t look too bad.

By last summer let’s just say we were lucky that we didn’t get written up by the Home Owners Association!

So this year I vowed to do better. I used to like yard work after all. But that was before I had kids and I actually had time to devote to things like Miracle Grow, Seven Dust, and leisurely trips to Home Depot.

But how hard could it be???

I started earlier this year with weeding the beds. While the kids would play, I would pull weeds. It worked for me and the children didn’t seem to mind that the location where they could play was dictated by which spot had the tallest, most undesirable plant growth.

I falsely assumed that not only would I get a great tan while working outdoors, I would also only have to do this every few months. As it turns out, once I finished going all the way around the house, it was time to start over! I only did that twice!

Okay, Yard: 1. Jodi: 0. I gave up and went to Walmart for a big batch of Round Up.

I got the Round Up out today and read all the directions. It was pretty easy. Just pump and spray. But there was a slight wind, so in an effort to avoid killing what’s left of the favorable plant life, I leaned way over and sprayed the weeds close to the ground.

Things were moving along quickly when I got to the driveway at the bottom of the hill. We have a long row of bushes that separate our drive from the neighbor’s and give a slight bit of privacy. I started in on our side and thought that when I got to the end, I would cross to their side and spray the weeds that they have to look at too. (See how nice I am?)

So picture this: Me. Bent over. Head down. Trying to keep the Round Up from accidentally blowing into the wrong plant. I am making good progress and out the corner of my eye, I see the end in sight. So I look up. And vaguely see something peeking out of the tall grass at me.

A SNAKE!!!!!!!!! A SNAKE!!!!!!!!!!!! A SNAKE!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, I screamed like an idiot! Yes, I threw the jug of Round Up! Yes, I backed up slowly and never took my eyes off of him, the whole time ready to break into a sprint if he so much as lunged at me! (He was at LEAST 14 feet long, ya know!)

I really didn’t want to concede to the yard again, but seriously, it’s got Mother Nature on its side. So until I think of a better plan…Yard: 2. Jodi: 0.

To be continued…